of the year for me. It seems to have gotten worse since I became
a mother myself. My mother would have been 54 today and a Nana to
the best two kids in the world and a mother in law to a wonderful man. I like to
sit and imagine what she would be like has a grandmother. I can see
her spoiling my children and playing with them in the yard, chasing them around and laughing.
I can see her reading Kaylynn "The Pokey Little Puppy", just like
she did me and dancing with Connor to Elvis trying to get him to go to sleep.
I can imagine the talks we would have about my children and things going no in my life. I can imagine her, tracie and I
going shopping together in Dallas with the kids. Her and Tracie would
also be close (I know that), she would love her as her own, just like
Tracie parents do me. I can imagine Tracie and mom showing up at the house
to take me and the kids to lunch. I can see Tracie calling to tell me
she just talked to my mom and I wont believe what advice she gave.
This day is always hard and it really doesnt get any easier, I cant even
begin to think about not being here to see Kaylynn and Connor grow up.
I know my mother was sick and wouldnt have always been
there because of her illness. I think God knew that it would hurt her more
to be here and not get to be a great mom then to not be here at all. Even
though I know she is in a better place and is at peace, it still rips at
my heart to know she will never see how much she has impacked my life and
her not being here made me a good mother. I am being the mother to my
children that she could never be to me. Even though she is not here my
children will always know who thier Nana was, thats so important to me.
I love you so much and wish everyday you were here, Happy Birhday Mommy!
Goodnight all; See ya'll tomorrow
:) ((hugs))
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